In the summer of 2010, I was 13 years old and The Nanny had been off the air for about ten years, surviving mainly through reruns on various cable channels, like Nick at Nite or Hallmark. It entered my life after a bit of mindless channel surfing, my hip teenage self sought out this quirky sitcom from the ’90s. It was hard to miss – after all, Hallmark shows the same episodes three times a day and the next episode will air at midnight. Once all six seasons have been shown, the entire series will start from the beginning. I know this because I spent that summer watching every episode of The Nanny at least twice a day, with C.C. Babcock easily and quickly became my favorite character.
I transported her and her sparring partner Niles before I knew what the word “transport” meant. Finally, I stumbled upon the Unofficial Real Nanny Home Page, the show’s oldest and most widespread fan site, which also hosts an extensive archive of novelizations of fans. The first fic I read wasn’t even a story about Niles and C.C. — instead, it’s a smutty article about Fran and Maxwell. I’m 13 years old! As far as I can tell, there are no warnings. Even if there were, I’m not sure I would understand their meaning.
2010 also marked a major shift in fandom from LiveJournal to Tumblr, and although I didn’t come from LJ, I came to the microblogging platform at the same time as everyone else. In the early days of Tumblr, I was at the peak of “tumblarity,” an algorithm that measures your popularity on the site on a daily basis, photo sets didn’t exist, and GIFs had a 500 kb limit. My blog is called pepperlane, after the grad school nickname of Lauren Lane, the actress who played C.C. Babcock. On my iTunes library, I’ve curated playlists filled with songs that remind me of C.C. and her dynamic with Niles, like Stephen Speaks’ “Out of My League” or Billy Joel’s “She’s Always A Woman.” I created GIFs from low-quality YouTube uploads of episodes divided into four almost unwatchable parts. At this point, there’s no doubt about it: The Nanny was my first fandom, Niles and C.C. was my first OTP and it was all I thought about for the past year.
C.C. – and by extension, Lauren Lane – have always been at the center of my Nanny experience. Reading the fic, I was fascinated with the author’s vivid descriptions of her, from the way her hair was always perfectly tied on top of her head to her blue eyes that always sparkled mischievously every time she made Niles quiet after a session. Great special quote. . While watching the show, I spent way too much time looking at her stockinged and sometimes gaping thighs, mentally punishing myself whenever I did. In the episode “Green Card,” when she stood at the kitchen counter while a Frenchman gently kissed her arm, I had the vague feeling of wanting to be in that Frenchman’s position. Whenever she and Niles kiss, whether in the movie or on the show, I wonder briefly, in every moment – never saying it out loud, never letting the words leave my mind – feeling What would it be like to kiss her?
That same year, I started my second year of high school. I had the same group of classmates, mostly the same teacher, Geometry instead of Algebra, Biology instead of Natural Sciences. As far as I could tell, it was just like freshman year — only this time I had a new favorite show to obsess over and a new English teacher to do the same. She had a Biblical name, she was tall and beautiful, and the sound of her heels hitting the floor, along with the room falling silent almost immediately, was a moment I still haven’t forgotten, even now. a decade later. She’s smart, agile, and reminds me of someone I don’t recognize. I spent that entire school year agonizing over her.
I wrote to her and brought her cheesecake and coffee, a combination that she told the class she loved. I keep her photo in my wallet, the same way I compare it to all my favorite actresses. “I know it’s creepy,” I wrote in a blog, and as if trying to convince myself that it was okay, I added: “But if it helps it’s because she’s on the same level with Helen (McCrory) or Tash (Richardson). ) ) or Lauren (Lane). That’s who he is; that’s who she reminded me of. In another blog entry, I listed their similarities, from the way they purse their lips to the shape of their hands. It made no sense, but to my young mind, it made all the sense in the world. “Both are beautiful (do I really have to say this?),” the list ends. Of course I am
